Top Seven Fucked up Jokes That Will Shock Your Friends


If you tend to enjoy dark humor or if people call you the king or queen of comedy, then you are probably aware of the various categories of jokes. Mostly, there are two kinds of formats that people are familiar with and those include the clean, funny jokes and fucked up ones. Both these types are hilarious, but the latter one might make you feel guilty for laughing in some cases.

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Everyone has come across such jokes at one point or the other and they can lead to a lot of shocked reactions as well. If you are looking for some fucked up jokes to share with close friends or at a party, you are in luck!

What do alcoholics and amputees have in common? They are both legless.

If you have ever been drunk to an extent where you weren’t able to move your legs or even take a single step, it may have given you the feeling of being legless. Now, everyone knows that amputees are people who have lost a limb or their legs due to a severe injury or medical or medical reason. The joke makes light of such people and compares the situation to alcoholics.

It takes into account how the only common factor between amputees and extremely drunk people is being legless. This joke is quite a witty example of word play and has the potential to make people cringe hard as well.

What is the difference between $50 and my kid? I care when I lose money.

There is a lot of humor that is based around people and their experiences with family or raising kids. This joke also focuses on the relationship between a parent and their child. The punch line focuses on the parent who cares more about losing $50 of money than their child. It is quite dark if you think about it but could certainly entertain or amuse a few people. 

What is my favorite thing about my grandpa? His life insurance.

Most people who have grandparents tend to enjoy their presence and spending time with them. But the person in this joke seems to love money more than their “grandpa.” This Helen Keller Jokes That Are Too Dark will definitely freak out everyone in the room, especially if you crack it in the middle of a family gathering. So refrain from doing so, or else your grandpa will always be on the lookout whenever you visit!

“Why is my sister named Rose?” asked the boy. “Because your mum loves roses. You already knew that, Cocaine,” replied the dad.

People often name their children after the things they love, and most of the time, they turn out to be quite sentimental. For instance, in this joke, the mum names her daughter Rose because she is fond of the said type of flower.

However, when you keep reading the joke, you’ll find out that naming kids after things people like doesn’t turn out good every time. The punch line takes that into account and highlights how the dad named his son after his favorite thing, cocaine. So, the lesson in this joke is that naming your kids shouldn’t be totally on the basis of things you love as it may not turn out so well for everyone.

Today was a really bad day. My mother-in-law was hit by a cab, AND I lost my job as a cab driver!

When someone says they had a bad day, you might assume that they got yelled at by their boss or lost their loved one. But the case in this joke is quite different because the reason for this person’s bad day is that their mother-in-law was hit by a cab that they were driving. In the end, that’s not even the worst part.

Since the accident caused them to lose their job as a “cab driver,” it became quite a terrible day. This is not the type of joke you should crack when you are visiting your wife’s parents, and there’s never ever going to be a right time to crack this joke with your in-laws.

What is the difference between onions and my dead grandma? I cried when I cut up the onions.

As mentioned before, everybody adores their grandparents, but some people just do not connect with them like the person in this joke. Crying at a funeral or in the first few moments after the death of a person is hard for some people, particularly when they are family or close friends. However, the person in this joke clearly didn’t like their grandma so their reaction was justified. 

The only difference this person was able to find between onions and their grandma was that they cried when cutting up onions but not when they cut up their grandma. It does also bring up the question of cannibalism. This joke is insanely dark and should be cracked in an audience that can handle such jokes.

Why are obese jokes so offensive? Because fat people have enough on their plate

Finally, the secret behind obese jokes being offensive has been revealed, and it is hilarious. Obese jokes are offensive because fat people already have enough on their plate to eat and don’t get time to deal with people who keep telling such jokes.

Furthermore, it is important to be careful while cracking obese jokes in front of people who are struggling with their weight. They can be hurtful and offensive so you should try and avoid sharing them in front of friends or family who have such a problem.

These fucked up jokes were some of the best jokes that the Internet holds for you, but there are still many that are yet to be discovered. Sometimes, people do enjoy such humor and can take it lightly as well. However, it is always a good idea to consider the audience carefully before sharing them or you could get a lot of angry and judgmental looks. If you have friends with a similar sense of humor, you might even get a few laughs or smiles at such jokes.